[~[.Memories.Of.You.And.Me.]~]

we're sorta betta terms ler

2004-09-02T22:38:00.000+08:00

hmm~ at least todae we werw kinda "back together"..morning was lyk usual.yar.i dunno lor.itx lyk ppl tink we're ok and lyk damn close but in actual fact,itx onli in the morningx then we sorta see each other. i mean for the past month lahhx.it was liddat.

todae kinda different.he came to find me todae.i dunno lor.i see him ler,dunno how to react.tot we wud b lyk damn quiet and lyk akward lor.but i was lyk damn happie to see him.happie till i became siiao.lolx.but he was luffin away at my stupidity of course.i din mind,as long as i could make him happie . thtx my wish =) .and ya,i hope i did.

urhhx. i dunno la.but to me,he looks lyk more 'new' and younger lookin when he got his haircut.damn cutte can !! den the specs he change ler,more cuteee !! haha.to me,itx handsum la,of course. i bet ppl will tink itx er xin.aiyoo !! *dun care !! he shoo handsum n cuteee !! lolx.especiallie now !! muz take a snap shot of him !! =p ...

*love ya dearr.i hope we can b as close as always.though aft patching,tingz dun usuallie turn out right,i wanna try again . try till we dun feel weiird or anyting . =) *muackk.huggiexx.

wanna go out wid u tml to watch moviie !! hope u can make it nehhx.

dunno lor

2004-09-01T22:11:00.000+08:00

haiix.i tink we're gona break very soon.i jux got that gut feelin.

cuz of todae.ive confirmed myself.tht we may not last very long.cuz ah.todae he also lyk kena frustrated by me.nowadaex he very easily angry wid me.and show me attitude.not onli tht,he lyk...frustrated then ...u noe..aiyo.itx lyk last time when calvin n glenda together.sumting lyk them.

lyk he cant stand me anymore.alil bit onli,he getx angry wid me.thtx how i feel.but he tries not to show lor.by his voice,can tell liao lor.haiix.i dunno wad to do.i dunno wad to sae.i dunno how long we will last.i dunno how long moreee.haiix.

i dunno wadx happening.aft we patched,many tingz changed.the way he treats me totallie changed too.haiix. im a bad gf la.thtx why he bcame liddat towards me.*soobb. i cant make him happie.yet he wantx to b wid me.i dunno wadde hell im doin wid him..haiix.

ppl sae,let nature take itx course.but i dunno how im able to do it.how can i leave sumting so important to me dangling in the air and not doin anyting to solve it? how can i jux hang it dere,and not getting to the root of the problem.how can i jux let it stay there,makes me so uncomfortable.

we're drifting

2004-08-30T20:40:00.000+08:00

haiix. we're drifting apart. esp since the dae we both patched. many ups and downs. not reallie shown between us lahx. in lyk jux keeping to ourselves about stuff lor.then lyk 'cold war' u noe.

i dunno.i feel troubled.we've reallie drifted..to our own fantasy world.sumtimex i jux ask myself aft we patched,'did he reallie wan me bac? or for the sake of feelin tht emptiness inside ?' i dunno.i reallie dun.im confused . by him ~ .it doesnt feel rite.

even todae.actuallie wanted to go out wid him sumwhere.but guess wad?he was goin home.cuz his frenx goin along. yar.so i jux asked him to get lost but indirectly. disappointing. and myself too.ive been givin him attitude.showing him attitude the past few daex.i reallie cannot tahan.i dunno lahx. i jux feelin very frustrated.

wad if it would turn out to be "all this time u were pretending,so much for my happie ending" ? pretending?i hope not.he seems frustrated when it cums to me.haiix.i changed.changed to the point i cudnt change anymore. and i guess he's feelin uncomfortable me wid liddat .

i can understand. but.i jux dun get it.i dunno.haiix. other daex he confirm gotta stay bac for EC. and of all daex,he's goin out todae. !! arhh !! I WAn TO CRY .I WAN TO CRY IT ALL OUT.I JUX FEEL HURT.SUMWHERE.SUMHOW.

sumhow,i feel tht he doesnt love me tht much ler. haiix. we shudnt haf patched. everyting is a mist now. everyting seems to b hazy.cloudy.dark.trapped.

we patched.

2004-08-21T13:53:00.000+08:00

i patched wid him .i dunno how it happened.but sumhow we did. *yesterdae was our 6mth.

yesterdae he asked me to meet him at nite.at my house the fountain.i was shocked.he suddenly msg me.he said he wanted to return me sumting.at tht point,i was lyk.i guess he reallie wanted to end it all.so i told him to jux throw it away.dun bother meeting me or giving it bac to me.he insisted on meeting.had no choice.

went to cut hair.he said he wud b waiting for me at 8.30.i told him in advance i wud b late.but he din bother.he said he wud wait.onli reached at 9.10pm.i was scared.i was afraid.my heart was thumping real fast.i din noe wad was ahead of me.i din noe wad to do.i din noe how i wud react.or wad to sae.i din noe wad was gona happen.at all.i was reallie nervous.but kinda kanchiong to get up there.=x

saw him.my heart froze.i felt lyk it stopped beating.i cud faint.i din noe how to face him.he handed me a paper bag.containing sumting inside which i had totallie no idea wad it was.then he started to cum closer.to tok to me.i tried hard to hide away frm the situation when he started to sae he was sorry and all those.and asked me to fogiv him n gif him a 2nd chance.i kept quiet.i avoided eye contact.i cudnt help it.i looked everywhere except his eyes.din dare see him.moved about.cudnt stand still cuz i felt weird.i din answer him at all.

i knew he was waiting for an answer.so i jux decided to break the silence.ask if he was gona stand there till i gav him an answer.then he started sayin all those craps.tht he was sorry.and explaining.blablabla.he toked about us.i was holding bac my tears.i kept trying.i did succeed at a certain time but to no avail.the tears started flowing out.lyk an overflowed glass of water.haiix.i cried.in front of him.i cudnt hide the tears.i cudnt tahan any longer.they jux came out lyk nobody's business.i tried to turn away frm him.but he kept cuming.and then he hugged me.

i din noe wad to do.i jux knew tht i had to cry.i wanted to cry.haiix.1st time i eva cried in front of him when i had problems wid him.well,he's the 1st.haiix.he held onto me.i jux kept my hands to myself.i reallie wanted to hug him real tight at tht point of time.but my hands din allow.i jux leaned my head onto his chest.

i had to stop cryin.cuz i knew my mum wud question me when i returned home.then i din noe how.but he started tokin to me lyk normal.and apologising.i kept denying it was his fault.dunno lor.then he sent me back home till we reached my level.

i dunno if itx all okay ler.but i guess we're bac together again.

todae i jux cant help but ..i feel angry wid him.i dunno.i jux got tis weird feelin.haiix.nvm.i tink too much.wadde....haix.

*We are not the same persons this year as last; nor are those we love. It is a happy chance if we, changing, continue to love a changed person.*

we broke

2004-08-19T01:02:00.000+08:00

it's been such a roller coaster ride.

we broke up lyk 2 daes ago.

all my fault i guess.everyting happened so fast.

but in the end,i was dumped.ya.still counted as tht.

then jux yesterdae i saw the tag board.tht gal's so mean.

haix.nvm lor.we alrdy broke up.she can haf him for all i care.

since she's MUCH BETTER than me.as she said.

cant help it wad.i suck ma.anyway,i dunno.rushin to get to sch now.waiting for my mum. -.-

was sick..he was here

2004-08-10T21:51:00.000+08:00

omg~ so long i nv blog here..*sad huhx..well,i din spend much time wid dearie for quite long liao worz...cuz got sch.then..i guess ive been goin out wid fwenz ..he too..=x..hmm~ reallie missed him lyk craziie when i was in genting...missed him so badly...

i was ill~...tht was lyk worse...when i got bac,dearie told me tht his keychain which i gav to him n wid my name ,broke not jux drop off in 1 piece..but lyk..the bell n the name broke lor..[he hang on his fone de]...

then lyk so sad lor..i was lyk *so dramatic???* lolz.. cux usuallie when sumting wrong then reallie will liddat..lolx..i kept tinkin..lolx..why lyk so coincidental?lolx..oh well..

im reallie very grateful tht dearie came to visit me todae..he so thoughtful~ though i noe he gotta go collect his basket ball thtx why he jux dropped by..at least he was concerned in a way~..thankiew dear...he was reallie a big bullie..

wanted me to pass him my "illness" oso..tht idiot..=x..lolz..well well...hope can spend more time wid him when im feeling betta... =).. lurve u deariiee... 10 more daex to our 6 mth anniversary...half a year !! *clap clap...lolz...

*muackz..

[5th month anniversary]

2004-07-20T12:17:00.000+08:00

kkayx..i din use com yesterdae..which was 2o.o7..ahas..who carex,jux write it as yesterdae..

okays...todae huhx..so happie ~ i gave dearie a ring..yepyepx..*muackz..hope he lykes it,got my name on it lehs..ahahs..

but mine dun hav..*sa-ded..lolx..

oh wells..ya..todae spent quite sum time wid him aft sch...waited fer him..took pics..went to play play at the swing..

sent me home...piggie back me..yax..so fun~ had a great time wid him...

hmm~ though we cudnt spend the rest of the time together,as long as we noe tht we lurve each other,thtx the best ting!~ been 150daex together ler... :) im happi wors..keke..

to dearie terter[tigger]:

i've known u since janurary~ started lykin u since chinese new year~ toked to u alot..by sms ...too shy to face u ~i knew u were the one rite frm the start..i jux din noe how to tell u ~ until the 14th of feb which was valentines dae,u asked me for stead...din accept u till 20th ~ hee..i noe i was stupie wanting to let go of the relationship in the past..but now,im nvr letting go..i cherish u too much..i love u too much to ever b able to let u go ~..i've learnt my mistakex..and i shall not do it again..it was u who made me realise how important u are to me..

i nvr fail to love u more than any1 else...the mistakex i've made,and how we ended those quarels showed me tht we cud bond together well~..it showed me tht it made our relationship stronger..in trusting each other..many of my frenx ask me why we are so peaceful n not havin any "war"...itx cuz i trust u ~ u trust me..and im reallie thankful for tht...

no matter wad,u can count on me to love u as much as u love me too...hoping tht we wud last long enuff...and the ring will always b together...

[sorry ahs,write so long..so long winded..jux wanna express out...]

[bloggie bac!]

2004-07-19T19:34:00.000+08:00

quite sum time since i blogged huhx~ well wellx..wad has been up?nth much..jux spending time wid dearie in sch lorhx..wad else can we do huhx? hee..

on saturdae,after ncc...dear waited for me ~ yeppiex.. then we sat outside the sch carpark where there were benches.. he gave me a ring..ahax..though it wasnt the one tht i had planned in my mind;it wasnt silver,but i still appreciated him using his money to get it...and borrow summoree..lolx..baddie..aha..

anyway,thanx alot.. tml is our 5mth month together..im so glad we made it tru so long...alot of my frenx keep askin me "why u n terence so good wan,lyk so peaceful,nv quarel at all?" in fact,we do quarel~ budden even if quarel,not everyting oso quarel ma..ahah..and i dun lyk to quarel much ~...

heex..itx jux a few more hours...how i wish i cud jux get out of the house when itx past midnite n jux run to him n giv him a big hug n a kiss ...~! ahhax..

but nahx....im so glad we're still together..i wun leave u la dear..dun alwayz sae lyk i will...im not sure if i will~ but for now,itx a NO ting ...okay?lurve ya !

muackz !

[the next few daex]

2004-07-11T20:58:00.000+08:00

din write for quite afew daex ler bahxz..ya..

wasnt feelin good..dear saw me cried for the 1st time on fridae..*sighs..he din do a ting..lyk..he din care for me at all...

jux HAHAHHAA-ing away...wid glenda n nayana..disappointed i was,but i noe he doesnt noe how to comfort galx bah..aiyoo..

then yesterdae morning..or shall i sae itx todae..we met up at my place at lyk 2plus..since my sis n cousin went down to drink..tok and get drunk?ah..ya..

then we went to railmall...tupie sia,cuming home,i reallie trusted him to lead me,so i closed my eyex..then suddenly i fell...cuz he din see where i was walkin..he jux minded his own way...

kena bruised..oh well..haha..then we jux take awalk n lie down..on the ground..shud b me bah..=x..was alil too hyper ytd..

he havin fever..hope he getx well soon..*sighx..

[past few daex.]

2004-07-08T20:44:00.000+08:00

haix..ahh..few daex nvr write liao..cuz too caught up..too tired..too lazy..=x..ya ya..im lazy..

hmm~the past few daexz..spent time wid dear after school lorxz..he waited fer me cuz i got entrepreneur..which sucked..i dunno why..i jux feel tht,itx a total waste of tyme if he waitx for me..he gotta study..but he ah..alwayz sae "dun care dun care" lolx..but so fun lor..can play wid himx..=x..

ya..while nayana and erhemxz together..on urh..when ah?tuesdae..ya..then late liao ma..so we din disturb them..we playplay...bball..haha..he did stupie trickx..but at sum partx i played him..=p..though,mostly he played me la...aha..but still,at least i did play him bac..=x..

ok..aiyo..we are mad..he came into the gerx toilet..and i went into the guyx toilet..aha..on my class level..then we went up to playplay..we are crazy,then we urh..dance dance..haa..so farnie..fun oso..hee..then he came to the toilet...wid me..ah..not funnie..jux..lyk..make out lor..hee..

betta dun tok much liao..dun wan to elaborate..onli we both noe itx good enuff..dun wan ppl to find tis er xin or wad..aha..

[todae at orchard]

2004-07-05T21:35:00.000+08:00

hahax,spent the dae at orchard..actuallie wid baohuix..then dear and kenny came..cuz they all nowhere to go,so folo us..i bet baohui felt akward..sorry ya fwen..~ hee..din mean it..haha..spent the whole dae at orchard..together wid dear..but not exactly so close wid him todae..cuz he n kenny were behind us..lyk our body guardx..lolxz..

then he help me to carry my bag..hee..walk here walk there..so fun ahhh~ jux tht abit sian..my leg tired..lolx..yea..walk n walk..

thtx about it lor..then we went home..very crappy neh todae..hahax..dunno narhxz..but jux crappie..we kept tokin..then lyk siaosiao..i tink i was abit hyper/..lolx..but in the bus,super tired..so sad i cudnt sit..haha.mini skirt ma..heh..so good,dear cud sit..haha..then he lean his head on my thigh there lor..hee..

lolx..he see me slp then stand to let me lean on him..lalallala...hehe...

then we went home together lor...he sent me home..thanx dear..

cant wait to see ya in sch tml..*muackz..huggiex..

hope can spend time wid u tml`!! wanna swim wid u too..heh..but dunno when worxz..hee..

[kakakax..o2.o7.o4]

2004-07-03T16:46:00.000+08:00

ahhh~yesh... yesterdae..fridae ..2nd of july..keke..so fast july ler lehxz..ahh~yes lor..wanted to go out wid dear..or go his house..but too bad,caught in school..cuz gotta do the tupie math..so many nia !! haha...

then dear came to look fer me..wah piang..he so hyper..lolx..craziie la he..so bored thtx why make so much noise..so talkative..lolx..then ah,sae so bored..mightself go play soccer wid his fwenx wad..heh..

nvm~then he go play bball..while i rot there,doin math..till lyk 3..lolx..and i was so hyper when he left..kept luffin nia..haha..then he came bac,so sticky!!!~eee yer..sweaty bum..bleahxz...

then we walked home..to his house i mean..ahahxz..yaya..playplay on the bed..stupie..din noe reallie whisper into his right ear can make him horny...eekx..ahha..ticklish + horny together..alamakxz...so sad..i made him horny..i din beliv leh,cuz ticklish ma...so i jux make make make..then reallie horny..LOL...

alamakxz..tupie idiiot..wad make me horny..*bleahx..* ahah..okok...dun tok crap liao..

i tink tis is too...hahahaha...kids should not look at tis sorta entry..=x..so paiseh..noeing tht mayb alot of ppl will look?kekeke...

ya..then he sent me home..haha..i hope my neighbourx wun tell my mummy tht they saw me n a guy leh...so scared..haha..ya ya..thtx about it..hee..

missin him now...aiya..he muz b enjoying lor he...heh...

*~x.::[133 daex]::.x~*

[forgot to write..]..hehe

2004-07-03T16:37:00.000+08:00

hehex..hmm~the past few daex ah..lemme see,din get to go oneline..but did spend time wid dear worxz..dunno where i stopped lahxz...

but i noe tht when my parents were away,i reallie hav enjoyed my time wid dear alot..hmm~oh ya..haha..

on the dae my mama cuming bac ritex,which is on the 3o.o6.o4,wednesdae,i had to stay bac,then aft dear's class,he went to look for me..hee..then we both ah,run away frm the group..i mean my group la..cuz gotta stay for entrpreneur..=p..then we went to the ulu ulu place..haha..at the music room there...got the stairx..under there..then urhh....we made out..hehehehe...awhile onli la..

then go home..he followed me..haha..i keep askin him to folo me to the fountain..bleahhxz..he keep sayin dun wan..wanna go my house..ahha..cuz my bro-in-law saw us,then i ask him if our parentx at home..he said no..and kept askin us to go up..ahha..aiyo..so farnie..

but i din dare..so ,jux go fountain..hee..so fun neh..the water super cold..obviously we made out again..so many times..aiyoo..ahha..i wanna finish my sentence,he dun let..he jux keep cuming closer to kiss me..aiyooooo~LOL...

so bad hor..baddie...so notty nehhh...then after tht he sent me up..anyway,he wanted to see the baby ma...keke..so liddat lor..his 2nd gf..haha..then i sent him out..we went seperately cuz i wanted to post letter..but i scared they cum bac,then can see us..hee..

[ur heart]

2004-07-03T16:36:00.000+08:00

Your Heart is Red

What Color is Your Heart?
brought to you by Quizilla

[[gosh!im damn happie!!]]

2004-06-28T21:47:00.000+08:00

hehex..im bac yasz!~ urhx...lemme see..*sa-ded case..now why?haha,cuz when i in bus 963 and stoppin at the bus stop to wait for him liao,i saw him walkin...about goin to reach home..at the railway there leh...haix..i so sad sialxz...

then i din bother to tell him,jux walked...lolx...suddenly he called..then after awhile,when he finished bathing n changing,he came to the bus stop..heex..then we went home..kekexz...on the way bac arhx,got tis cat wor...so cute de leh...cuz i siao siao..suddenly run down to my block there..then i scare a cat cuz it was there..ahah..ran away,then when we went up,the cat lyk hiding..lolx..suddenly cum up to us..wanting food wors...

hee..folo us leh...we went into the lift,the catty oso folo..kekex..so i gave it sum milk n sardine..=p..then my sis bathe it..keke..keep walkin in and out of my room sia..then when me n dear were lyk...on the bed makin out,it also jump on the bed..ahaha...so cute wor..active catty! so daring summore..ahahx..

cute lehhhx~yeppie..then we "escort" the cat dwn..keke..then..we kept goin up n down in the lift..haha..press so many levelx..we siao worx..! ahahx...guess wad we were doin?obvious answer..shall not answer tht question..LOL..ok lah...then i decided to go 10th levell..[last floor]..cuz got roof excess..hehe..then we went to check,reallie can go wor !!

then we climb climb up there..aha..so shuang leh..lyk on top of the world..can see the sun setting..can see the beautiful sky..hehez..and watchin it wid dear...*muackz..keke..

then we went bac down..ahahxz...so fun sia in the room play..LOL..heex...*missing him now worsx..* haixx..i wish he cud b by my side now..aiyo..left 1 last dae which is tml~ i wanna spend it wid him~ wan it to b meaningful~hahax...then i wish he can cum my house tonite..*sighz..lolx..why ah?i dunno..jux cum playplay?lolx..tok tok~ tok crap ahhh~

hee..oh yea..then sent him home..LoLx...i sO hyper jux now nia..ahha..play n play while walkin..lyk siao siao who jux took sum drugx or alcohol..lolx..lyk so HIGH wor..=x..hehe..

then we playplay..he abit siaosiao too..ahah..then we in the lift go up n down again..-.-..lolx...play n play..so farnie..ahahxz...but i enjoyed..

i wish he can cum later..*sobx..but dun wan la..he tired..hehx..oh ya !! tht tupie idiot..lolx..anyhow gimme a wad...love bite?EEEEEE.....so ugly noww..ahahxz...tupie idiot..if i kena scolding,i kill u sia !!~ tml sure tio..die liao die liao!!!~ ahaz..tupie..haha..nvm..

lurve ya dear!*muackz n huggiesx..

[happi happi..alwayz happie]

2004-06-28T15:57:00.000+08:00

heexz...such a fun time..aiii~ cant remember much about the past few daex..when i nvr go online..ahaxz..but i noe i reallie enjoyed it..

yesterdae was one of the daex which was also happiest de..hee..why huhx..cuz i spent the whole dae wid him!~~ hehe..he followed me to church worxz...good rite?hee... hmm~ total i tink spent wid him lyk..12 hrx wid him~ hehexz...

morning,he came my hse..then play baby awhile..i change,then we went to church...wid dennis too~ then go mac eat eat ..then urhx...went to dear's house..hee..do his video for his krew the bball dexz..hahaxz..then after tht at about 5,we reached the salvation army..~hee..

then i was lyk the onli gal there when i went in..-.-...but aft awhile got ppl lahx..hee..so dear went to play bball..then i jux sit and watch..so sad nia,i kena hit buy the soccer ball...PAIN!!!! lolxz...heck care lahxz..

hehx..then after tht,we went to the games area,he play the drumx..nice wor ~! ahhaxz...then we went to his house...he piggy back me lehx...=P..so xing fu..cuz i force him~ haha..jkjkx...

so dark..no one home..kekekxz..then he came my hse fer dinner..so malu leh...my sis n the fwenx all there..ahax..but she ask me go bac eat ma..aiyox...hee...so fun ahhz~

then we all in my room,play play..lolx..tupie ahhh dear...play wad tongue tingy..ahahxz..disgusting boiiiii!~ lolxz...so fun lahxz hor...play wid u..ahahxz...

then 11pm he went home..heexz...

....yeppie...itx about 4plus wor..goin to fetch him frm sch soon~ heex..cuz he ends at 4.30..shhh!! *surprise time!! hehe..

yeppie..hope he happi..LOL..yea,cum my house again..=p...muz make him do hmwrk arhhhz!!~ i oso gotta do..haha..anyway,gotta get ready worx..*surprise time !~~

*~[.128 daex.]~*

[actualliie]

2004-06-25T20:34:00.000+08:00

heex...actuallie arhx..i change my hairstyle abit cuz dear dear ask "why not change diff parting or wad..now ur parting old fashion liao.." lolx..sumting liddat~ i did plan to cut earlier..not sure if i wanting to...

heex..but since he said,so i decided,hey why not?lolx..anyway,i wanna get frinch too~ hahax..dunno if he'll tink itx nice or wad norx..but..i hope he lykex it...as long as he tink itx nice[which is frm his heart worx!],i'll b very happie n pleased...as long as he tinkx it nice,i dun care wad other peepx sae about my hair..=)...

heexz..well,dear ahx..when u see me,tell me kayx?i wanna hear the truth..dun bluff me jux to please me..pweex?thankieeeww..hehex..lurve ya

[im.waiting]

2004-06-25T20:25:00.000+08:00

hehex,yesterdae toked to dear on the fone wors..but i slept~haha..i mean..i waiting fer his call ma,so i suddenly sleep..when he call,i suddenly woke up..=x..hahaxz..but i bathe 1st,msg him~then he called..we talked awhile wors..heexz..

then todae huhxz..i had ncc..wah sux man..then i goin to westmall meet my mama lerxz,he came..cuz anyway he gotta go choa chu kang..kekexz...his index finger swollen..cuz of playin bball lahs!aiyo...so careless..hmphx!! ok anot?? *care for u nehx..next time dun so careless kayx?not ur fault totallie but still..heex..

yeppiex..im now waiting fer u to come online..*sobx .. but i tink surely very long cuz u enjoying urselfx..hee,nvm lahxz..i tink i goin offline soon bahxz..hahax...

yeppiexz..then arhx,he nvr go for mrs sim lesson!! tupie boi..dun wanna improve on his subjectx,den go out slack wid fwenx...baddie !!! lolx..so notty..next time i dun tok to u over the fone liao!! hehx..

anyways,hee..hope can tok to u later..over the fone..then watch soccer[Euro 2004] together..hehex..=)..yeppiex..

hope mayb u can cum over to my place during the few daex my parentx not in singapore...which is frm sundae to wednesdae..hehex..can mahx?anyway,thtx about it...

lurve ya loadx dear!*muackkx n huggiex...

[mmiissiinngg.yyoouu]

#~[*125.daex*]~#

[.bus.stop.tok.over.the.fone.]

2004-06-24T20:52:00.000+08:00

hehex,todae huhxz..i woke up super early,1stly becuz of my rabbit..2ndly becuz im waiting fer my dear to wake up..ahahxz..he came to my place at about 11 plus bahxz..then we walked to the bus stop cuz he goin gab's house to do hmwrk mahxz..[dunno whether reallie got do anot niaxz..or onli playplay..ahahxz]so he came lorxz..then anyway itx cuz we wanted to see each other..=)..summore we toked over the fone at nite...frm 12am to about 3.30am ~ heex..so fun ahhz..i went to drink milk milk tht time,he fell asleep!!aiyo!!so cute sia..ahaxz..but got wake up soon enuff lahx..if not i wait n wait till zzz too!hahax..okok..bac to morning..

yeppiex..we tok tok tok~ then i show him my personal diary..=)..which was wid me ever since end of pri5..ahaxz..i wrote everyting inside...the 1st few entries can luff lyk siao..cuz alot of crappiness lahxz...very nutxz...i tink of it oso lyk so childish n lame..ahahxz..and also so naive..lolxz..then he arhx,luff at me!~hmphx!!

haahxz..yeppiexz..did enjoy my time at the bus stop wid him..hehexz..dear dearx,careful kayx?will cya when school re-opens...hehexz..or on sundae maybe...cuz my parents will b out in bankok...=)..anyway,lurve ya!*muackz*

[.missing.him.lyk.crazy.*sigh.]

2004-06-23T12:05:00.000+08:00

heex..im bac~ i bet dear is much enjoyin himself rite now~ yesterdae he din go home~he went his fwen's house..ya~ ..thought i could tok to him much longer than expected..but so pathetic..so short onli..lyk a few seconds..[to me]though it was afew minx~yea lorhx...*disappointing* cux..hah,i wanted to tok to him longer mahx..left these few nitex onli~ cuz when go bac to sch,mux sleep early~

[.missing him.] stupid rite?dae n nite miss him when got betta tingx to do..=x..but still,i dun mind~ yea..todae,itx gona b boring fer sure..and i noe he'll b enjoyin againx~ leaving me here..to..rot..and miss him~ so bad ah..bullie me..lolx..ok lahx..luvre ya ~

~*[.x123x.xdaex.xtogetherx.]*~

[yet another boring dae.missing him]

2004-06-22T19:27:00.000+08:00

todae is super boring~i din see dear nor did i tok to him over the fone~i bet he's havin fun playin his bball now~ till lyk 9plus~ haix..wad a boring dae it is todae..no excitement..nvr spend any time wid him at all~ oh wellx..

jux wanna tell him tht im missing him rite at tis very moment now~ and i hope the daex faster pass by till i get to see him everydae~which is when school re-opens~ lurve u loadx dear..have fun n enjoy urself ! will b missing u~ *mauckx*

[lyrics of "without you" by kim feat.clay]

2004-06-22T16:23:00.000+08:00

[[Without You]] Feat. Clay Aiken by Kimberly Locke

(CLAY)

Never even thought to cry

When I heard you say good-bye

Never said where you were going

There's no laughter in the air

Only silence everywhere

And so much left unspoken

Since you've been gone

I haven't been the same

I wish that I could see

Who's to blame

Chorus :

Without you, where do I belong?

Without you, how can I go on?

No love but yours will ever do

Tell me how am I supposed to live my life without you?

(KIM)

Was I lost in you and me

To the point I couldn't see

That what we had was dying

Now it's all that I can do

(TOGETHER) To see photographs of you

And stop myself from cryin'

I should learn to live without your love

(TOGETHER) Got so many memories, but it's not enough

(TOGETHER) Repeat Chorus

(CLAY) I feel helpless and oh so all alone

(KIM)Ooh Like I've never felt before

(KIM) You made me feel alive (ooooh in background sung by clay)

(TOGETHER) But I don't remember what it's like anymore

Repeat Chorus

[she wanx him bac..nicole~wans him bac..]

2004-06-21T23:48:00.000+08:00

"cheryl .. i know dis few months .. u mux have hated me .. but .. i've made my decision.. you love terence more den i do .. n he is happier with you .. i have no right to get him back .. i will get out of terence life .. when there is a you , there cannot be a me .. i admit i shouldn't have gave him up tat time .. but now he has you .. "

"i cannot make him come back to me .. "

"honestly speakin .. juz a sentence.. as long as u are with terence i will stay out of his life.. but if u were to break up with him .. i wan tat guy back in mine life.."

haix..who does she love??i see her friendster~she lyk lurve so many guyx..*sigh* dunno who she wanx lah..of course im feelin sad..i wanna cry..i dunno..im jux afraid i might lose him~ haix..i bet if she had told him tht she still loved him much earlier when we 1st stead,me n terence wudnt hab gotten tis far..cux he still loved her at tht time..now,i reallie dunno..~

i dun wanna b the person fighting over his love..i dun wanna stand in between them..cux they did hav a start b4~but..it jux hurtx so much to noe tht there's another ger lovin him so much too~ and reallie wanting to get him bac at anytime tht i let him go..~i dun wanna let go ~ i reallie dun...but i dunno why..and i jux cant help it..my hands muz be too itchy~ they alwayx wanna type "go bac to her" ..~ my mouth too~ so itchy huhx..i may b sayin this out loud..and tellin him i wan him to go bac to her,but deep down inside my heart,it is reallie aching..itx cryin...the past terror is coming bac to haunt me~ *sighx* if onli i knew tis was cuming,i wudnt hav been together wid him~

im so afraid..im jux too afraid of letting go~ but everytime,in any relationship,if another gal wanx my guy~ i tend to giv up~ i jux dunno why..cuz mayb he will b happier wid the other ger...thtx my opinion~ i dun tink he can find happiness in me..*sighx* wad shud i do~

i jux dunno why..but i feel lyk cryin..*sigh* help help help~ Oh God~ i noe i shudnt worry about tis sorta stupid stuff..i noe itx jux love..but..wad shud i do?ahhhh~
*-heartachex are bac-* jux lyk a expected..i knew tis wud happen~*sighx* ..as i knew,love wud alwayx hav a cut..sumwhere..jux hurtx...~

she sae she wans him bac if im gona let him go~ haix..how soon will it be?i dunno if by tht time,she wud still love him?but i tink she's the devoted sort..thtx my guessing..~if we break,he's definitely goin bac to her..*sighx* how i wish~ noting of tis sort happened..ahhhhhhhh~ i hear "without.you" the song i reallie wanna cry~ *[holdx bac tearx]* mux b brave..cant cry..lyk i alwayx tell my fwenx..wahhh~ i jux feel so stupid cryin over tis sorta stuff~ dun u tink im stupie?i am~ *stupid me~*

[Terence!~]

2004-06-21T23:05:00.000+08:00

T	Timeless
E	Exquisite
R	Relaxed
E	Explosive
N	Noisy
C	Charismatic
E	Exhausting

Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com

[he's bac!and im lovin it~] [we're together again~out]

2004-06-21T22:42:00.000+08:00

yay! he's bac..after those daex..4 daex or so..i reallie missed him alot ya~ and todae we did go out to orchard..ahha..he asked me out todae..actuallie,yesterdae he ask if todae wanna go out..so i asked my mama..she sae can..=)

yea..shall type about todae..but yea..yesterdae nite we were tokin over the fone..i was doin my english then..=p..im gona miss him the next few daex..bet we're not gona meet cuz he goin to gab's house to do hmwrk...missing him~ even now..

we went orchard..the most we did was jux take neoprintx...took 3 typex ya~ ahha..all frm different machines..so fun ~ but sumtimes i dunno if he reallie wanna take wid me anot?i scared he reluctant but he force himself to take..cuz mayb he dun wanna take?or issit cuz no more money for the next time he goes out wid his krew? i dunno..im jux afraid he's frustrated or wad but dun wanna sae..*sighx* oh wellx..nvm~ 1st,we stopped at far east..~ go walk walk around the place..saw alot of nice clothes..=)..but lyk so akward to go see see the clothes when he's around..i mean..all sorta guyx..=x..dunno lehx lehz..nvm~ but i wanna save..next time den go shop~hee..ok lahz..then ..we walk walk walk..saw neoprint shop,then go take take..heex...

so fun worzx..got sum ahx..lyk blurblur..aha..i mean..we "pose" urhz..hee..i lyk the np we took tht i gav him a kiss on the cheekx! =) i jux lurve tht..hee..lyk we alwayz take always same pose sia..aha..so farnie..then we went to hmv..take neoprint again..he muz tink im siao..ahha..then he said he saw a gal ..his online fren..ahh~ at 1st ahz,i saw a gal ah,short short wan..lookin at me..i was lyk...*urhh??* then i blurblur lor..so i jux hide bhind dear..ahah..i mean jux stand bhind him~heex..den suddenly thtx the online fren..-.-...anita/hmm..i remember tht name..i tink there's one time at sch bball court,i saw her msg..lolx..oh wellx..jealous wor..*jealous* hahah..cuz he tok to her on the fone blablabla..aiya..he tok to so many galx on the fone..aha..cannot blame..i oso tok to guyx..but is they call wan ma..haax..

yeax..then i kept askin him sae byebye..alamakx..1st time see him lyk so shy..-.-..~~oh well..forced him to sae ~ i dunno leh..everytime i jealous or so..and the gal is right in front of me,i will force the guy to do sumting tht obviously he wudnt wanna..lolx..i mean..not tht lahz..lyk jux purposely ask him go tok to her those sorta stuff?yea..dunno lahx..

hee..then went home about 5plus..so tired..slept abit in the bus..STANDING~ sian man..legs so tired..ahahx..then went home wid him~ he fetched me home..reached bac at about 7~ heehx..thanx dear for the enjoyable time we had together todae..lurve ya ~ muackx~!*forever together* urh...~hehe..

[How to make me,Cheryl! =) ]

2004-06-19T14:52:00.000+08:00

How to make a Cheryl

Ingredients:

1 part mercy

5 parts self-sufficiency

3 parts joy

Method:
Layer ingredientes in a shot glass. Top it off with a sprinkle of sadness and enjoy!

Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com

[[on the fone wid dear on the 16th at nite~=) ]]

2004-06-18T17:59:00.000+08:00

hahaz..b4 i went out wid wilson kor,was kinda sleepy..budden still,toked to dear over the fone..ahahz..
tok frm 11.30pm to lyk 4am..~ahahaz..so about 5 hrx hor..hee..

so fun..~ but i wasnt reallie myself..ok lahz..tired at about 3 mahz..so abit serious..ahah..nth to sae...i mean..okay lahz..fun !~ cuz first,he call my hp tru his mama fone,then i call him bac wid my fone..lolz..then aft tht i use my hse fone to call him...but aft awhile,my sis wanted to use,so i use my hp call him..then suddenly my sis tell me use her hp cuz got free incoming..so he call me..lolz..then after tht my sis wan bac her fone,so i use house fone call him..diao~-___-||| confusing ritez?ahha..change here change there till blur~so many times summore..but fun lor..ahahahz...

then..ahahz..at about 3 arhz..he becum super hyper sehz !! aiyo !! haahhaa..tok n tok n tok..i keep sayin bra bra bra..lolz..i dunno why lahz..cuz i wanna buy ma..the hooter neck..haha..he ahz..so farnie..so nice to tok to him..i dunno ahz,when tok to him,i lyk wanna tell him everyting de..everyting!~~ hee..then i oso tell him abt the bra lor..ahahahaha..dunno why sia...

*nutz* then..aiyo..i din noe he goin malaysia..till he told me he was goin at 6.30~ *sadx* i miss him so much !!! tokin about him makes me miss him now..haiz..till sundae lehz..aiya..then aft we put down,i went to slp..

i wanted to wake up at 6 de lehz..but i tink i din hear my alarm clock..haix..dunno why nowadaex ah,when i super tired or wad,surely cannot wake up de..even alarm clock oso cant help~ haix..

yea...im waiting...plz cum home soon~!!!!!!!!!!!! i wanna giv u a big warm hug n a kiss dear ~!! *sadz*

i wanna giv him the card..haiya..i missed his calls yesterdae nite cuz i fell aslp~ i feel so useless..i miss him~ even yesterdae...even when i went out wid wilson ..he was in my mind all along...oh well...i lurve u dear !! haiiiiii~ missing u real badly.......wanna cry...

[[happiest dae of my life!how many happiest dae niax..lolz..trip to east coast beach!]]

2004-06-14T22:24:00.000+08:00

heya! din reallie write yesterdae did i ?lolx..anyway,todae i had so much fun ~!! it was lyk the best dae ever..[wundering how many best daex i will ever have! =x]..ahha,yeppie..todae went to the beach..wid dear,kenny,yuan boon & gab..hee..gab shaved his hair ~!! lyk the rock sial..haha..ok..

1st,i went to dear's house..at about 9plus..then sort out his revision papaerx,so many nia !~ lolz..urhz..yeppie..then went to lot 1 mac to mit kenny gab n yuan boon..took 190 to orchard,then 16 to east coast..wah sehz,super long to reach there nia..lol..lyk 1hr plus..when we reach,about 12 plus ler..i tink 1pm actuallie..kekez..then we were lyk,finding place to sit..but we din hav mat,so we went to 7 11..buy table cloth..so pathtic n flowery nia ~! lolz!! =x..then i 1st to go to the beach..sit down..suddenly dear carried me,almost throw me inside nia !!! lol..lucky i got my hp wid me..bleahz..lalala..then after tht,suddenly dear carry me again..tis time her reallie throw me inside the sea..diaooox..so wad sia the wave..so high !! the tide ~!! the water super salty!! *eekx* ahh..

then we play play play...then oso cover kenny kor's feet wid sand..ahah..so fast can cum out sehz..cuz i was digging hole when they play soccer ma,then suddenly kenny "volunteer" lol..then we took foto,all sae we taller than him cuz his legz kena buried ~ ahaha,so take foto till shuang! =x..then gab's turn! he sat in a monk position..lolz..then bury him till his head..then all took pic again..lolz..then bury me..cuz when he sit hor,cum out got 1 plyk "chair"..u noe..aha..then i sit..then dear n kenny cum bury me..lolz..so shaung..i lie down then they bury..ahha..but nvr take picx..=(..sa-ded..if not can see how farnie i look..=x..hee...

then went to swim swim in the sea..actuallie,can nvr swim in the sea lah,cuz so high sia the tide..can even go anywhere..then the wave will push me away..lolz..then i cannot reach the ground sehz,lyk drowning lidday,so scary~!! lolz..lucky got dear to carry me all the while..hee..but he kena cut cuz his feet hit the coralx at the bottom..=(..*sadx* oh well,then all went to shower...

wah seh,they bathe super long! lolz...longer than me nia..=x..lalala..then we go eat eat..but then so tired ler..*yawn* ..1st time i reallie sleep in bus sia,lyk u noe...supposed to stop at kallang budden every1 all sleepin away so we stopped at orchard again..hehx..sial lahz,slp till so shiok...slp till i din even noe i was slping..lolz..cuz i alwayz cannot slp in the bus de...so meanz todae super tired..wanted to slp now,but came online juz to write write..=x..=p..

then reached home at about 6.40pm..hee..fun sia todae ~!! took many picx wid dear! though got no neoprint machine,still got my digital cam!!~ haha..nvr use the normal cam...sad sehz..lalalala..oh well,juz here to sae tht im real happi..and i reallie enjoyed my dae todae! thanx thanx thanx! *muackx* lurve ya loadx dearie..ure the best ting tht has ever happened in my life..

[cheryl!]hehe

2004-06-12T21:56:00.000+08:00

C	Casual
H	Honest
E	Eccentric
R	Relaxed
Y	Young
L	Luxurious

Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com

[[lyrics to tata young's song "I tink Of u"]]

2004-06-11T23:10:00.000+08:00

I Think Of You

When I'm down and all alone
When nothing seems to matter
When I lose my hope
When I'm sad and confused

When it all gets turned around and 'round
I can't seem to reach for solid ground
When everything I've believed in seems untrue
All I have to do

Chorus
Is think of you
I think of you and it's gone
Like you chase away the storm
Making it all okay
I think of you
I think of you and I'm strong
And I know I can go on
It's like you set me free
When life gets the best of me
I just think of you

Now I know what love means
And whatever life may hold for me
Through the fire
Through the rain I believe

Cause there's nothing I can't bear
Knowing that you will be there
If I fall I won't break
Through it all I'll make it through
Cause all I have to do

(Chorus)

And when I think I'm all alone
I can't see the way to go
Lost in the rain of my own tears
To wash away the pain and fear

(Chorus)

For the good times and the bad times
I just think of you
Cause you know you get the best of me
I just think of you

Written by : Robin Scoffield and Reed Vertelney
Published by : Sony/ATV Songs LLC, Levosia and

[happi dae nia!a trip to orchard!=)]

2004-06-11T21:21:00.000+08:00

hmm..todae huhz..woke up at about 10.25am..hehe..cuz goin out mahz..=)..wid yonglin,ben pow and terence..then terence ahz,he ask me wake him up..then..ok lor..he msg me at 5am leh..so late nia...hehx..1st msg-nvr reply..then glenda call him 1st time-nvr ans...2nd time-nvr ans..then the next time was me who called-nvr ans...till lyk 11.50 then he called me bac n apologised..so disappointed nia..he already noe tht he goin out todae still wanna sleep at 7am..-.-

then met him on da bus..haha..cuz we "planned" to as he wudnt b able to make it if he were to walk to my hse bus stop..then met yonglin n ben at mac..wah piangx,they both ahz..haha..walk super fast..=x..i mean mayb we slow lahz..aha..they go everywhere oso walk so far in front of us..=x..then we went to orchard..cine to watch show..din hav confessions of a teenage drama queen..sad sehz..so watched a cartoon.."Home On the Range" quite nice..haha..me n terence got the back seat to ourselves..so nice n special..hehe..only the sidez hav..=)..for juz the 2 of us..haha..super cold nia! haha..shivering lyk siao..

hmm~ then after tht we took neoprint..haha..the 2 guyz lyk quite reluctant lor..hee..so fun..the machine lyk super fast lor..haha..then quickly change the background..and lyk all of us so blur..dunno wad to do then kan chiong lyk siao..but so fun sehz..! ahhaz..da picx nice wor..then ben had to go home so yonglin went off too...left me n terence..hee..i saw so many nice clothingx nia..wanna buy!!!! haha..urhz..then we walked to fareast plaza there..keke..go da "underground" place..for teenx de..alot of nice stuff sia..haha..then got neoprint shop!! i lyk wanna take so badly..=x..so i forced terence take wid me..hehe..so fun nia..sit stand sit stand the machine..hehe..=)..so nicE!!! in lurve wid those picx!!hehe..

well well well..wundering where i shud put the picx nia..or shall i laminate?lolz..dunno lahz..leave it liddat lorhz..hee..muz put in a nice nice box or place..where can hide it..hehe..if not,i dunno where to put nia..keke..then we walked bac to mrt station...suddenly ahz,got 1 gal..workin at mtv i guess?cum to us then ask us to lyk ...u noe..interview those sorta stuff about hpx and new tech tingy..the feedbac frm teenx..i was lyk.."oMG!!!mtv??i wan!!!!!!" ahha..but when i knew it was gona b filmed down..i was ...urh!! damn scared nia !! cuz i lyk will confirm luff lyk siao..hahaz..then liddat lor..in the end nvr..cuz see terence lyk dun wan oso..aha..then we went to westmall,buy chicken rice...then go home..saw nasri on the bus..lolz...

so happi todae!! reallie reallie damn happi!! lurve u loadz dear!!hehe..eh..i wrote damn long hor?kekez..

2004-06-08T22:55:00.000+08:00

heyax! hehe..im happi yes i am..im feelin lyk the luckiest..most happi ger in the world..ok ok,not so kua zhang bah..feel lyk the happiest most luckiest gal in singapore..=P.. well well..how shall i saE it?

todae..went to dear's house..aww man~! lurve it !! haha..ok lahz,quite scared but not as scared as b4..hmm..very happi lor..went to his room..then watch the shrek2 movie on vcd..haha..he suddenly go close the curtain..so dark sia..haha..but so fun..can cuddle up in his bed..=)..tht was damn shiok lor..cuz his bed damn comfy n nice~!! zZz..abit sleepy but still din sleep..watched all the way...

then when finish ler,we kept playin..how to sae it huhx..i keep takin his fone to delete all the remains of my picx..=P..so fun~..then he keep sayin me bad..and then keep tickling me cuz i kept deleting..hahaz..so ticklish!!~ he ahz..lyk threaten me..everytime i dun wan do sumting,lyk cover my faace dun let him see,he sae "u dare?" then start to tickle me till i hav no choice..but he tickle 1 time can liao..i sure surrender..haha..

very the fun lor..play here n there..tied my hair up..ahaha..he carried me..very happi~!!so fun...cant express my joy~! hehe..then we frenched ya..=x..urmz..so shiok~! tis time i nvr make any move..haha..keep sayin i keep my mouth closed..then arhz,his tongue keep coming..=x..am i gross?ahha..juz sayin wad happened..we lyk..french quite long n so many times..-.-..haha..urhx..dunno leh..everytime i go his house..well,onli twice,i bet surely will french..other then tht,i duno when..hahaz..so shiok lor..=)..eh..oh yea ~! then i oso kept tickling his neck...haha..he scared..bully him~!! cuz he bully me too..keke..

had loadx of fun todaae dear..im glad i spent it wid u..reallie enjoyed QUALITY time together..hehe..nite..lurve ya loadx!im very sure im not gona leave u~!! at all!! i hope..we'll see how long we can last..i bet itx gona b long~! =)..so fear not,i wun leave u !

What im wishing to do/get wid terence dear ! my tigger ! hehe

2004-06-04T13:30:00.000+08:00

[go to the beach wid him]

[buy same shirt as him]

[get same bag as him!]

[take more neoprints wid him]

[take picx using my cam(wid film) so that can keep as memories]

[go orchard wid him! go shop shop!]

[go roller blading wid him]

[go swimming wid him !]

[ice skate wid him!]

[goin to his house..hehe]

What i wanna do

2004-06-04T13:20:00.000+08:00

My plans[wad i wanna do]

-Watch movie ! [harry potter//confessions of a teenage drama queen!]

-Get my ears pierced again! [the top of the ear that part]

-Get my nails done

-Go to the Beach to enjoy//relax//slack//roller blade!

-Go out wid Wilson on His bdae ! [24th june]

-Ice skaTing

-sun tan![my back]

-go shopping!

.......

[aiming !]

2004-06-04T13:05:00.001+08:00

What i aiming to get !!

1)Nike Shoe

2)Silver Earrings//Studs

3)Getting my ear pierced!

4)Cute cuddly Soft toys

5)Billabong Bag//any sorta bag as long as have a good brand..=) [for school]

6)Converse Bball Pants

7)Pure Milk Shirt[Get the same wid terence]

8)Tight Jeans

9)Billabong/Converse Walletx[those girly cute ones that dun get stained easily]

10)New branded watch![Myabe fossil,addidas or any branded cute watches]

11)Any Sling bag will do too =)

12)Nail polish! [Silver,light colours!]

13)Facial Wash//Mask! [from The Body Shop]

14)Tank Top shirts[mayb from THis Fashion]

15)*Bra!!![can take out the strap de!]

[hopex dreamx wishes]

2004-06-01T17:53:00.000+08:00

1) wish i could be a model

2) wish i was rich

3) wish i could have a new bag

4) wish i could have many clothingx

5) wish my parentx would allow me to go to orchard

6) wish my parentx wudnt object me to havin a relationship

7) wish i could take neoprintx everydae

8) wish that i was taken in by mediacorp to do some acting too

9) wish i was popular

10) wish i was sweet

11) wish i could own a sportx car

12) wish that my future boyfren will ride a motorbike so that he can bring me to places[nvr sit in a motorbike b4]

13) wish i could migrate to Australia[soon enuff,2more yearx]

14) wanna get a good job..

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ok..wadeva..im nutx..my 1 ting piority,get a doggy ~!! and be a model !! =) ..hope my mama will sign me up..budden,no fwenx,i scared ! and i bet i wudnt b accepted..oh well..dunno lahx..tinkin..*tinkx tinkx tinkx* i reallie wanna hav a model life..career..*sighx* im still waiting for that dae.......

*[~[.Memories.Of.You.And.Me.]~]*